From A's to C's! WTH??

TwinsForever · #1 11-20-2008, 08:22 AM

My son who is normally an 'A' student is all of sudden getting C's! He just started middle school so I'm hoping that it's just the transition and adjustment that he needs to over come.

So my question is what do we do as parents when he brings home is report card this afternoon? Our first instinct and what we already told him, was that everything electronic will be taken away from him i.e., phone, ipod, Gameboy DS and the Xbos & Wii video games.

But in all honestly, is that really going to work? Anyone going through this or have been through it with 'tweens!

When I was his age I was all A's & B's and my parents never had to punish me or threaten to punish me so I can't go by what happened to me if it will work or not. You think when they are babies that it's so hard to deal with them, then the hormones start kicking in!! Oy!

Curly · #2 11-20-2008, 08:30 AM

Don't take anything away yet. Talk with him first. "you usually get A's and B's, is everything alright?"
If he gets an attitude, kick his ass. jk
Talk with him first. Good luck.

Decent · #3 11-20-2008, 08:30 AM

Parent-Teacher conference, right away. Find out what's going on as far as the teachers are concerned. Talking too much, too distracted, or do the teachers seem to be too frazzled to give the attention needed, or is it a problem of not 'getting' things. Thats the first step, it'll provide you a lot more information so you'll know what to do next.

Green Lantern · #4 11-20-2008, 08:34 AM

I agree with Curly and Decent. Talk is the first step.

Talk with your kid and talk with your kid's teachers.

Curly · #5 11-20-2008, 08:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Decent

Parent-Teacher conference, right away. Find out what's going on as far as the teachers are concerned. Talking too much, too distracted, or do the teachers seem to be too frazzled to give the attention needed, or is it a problem of not 'getting' things. Thats the first step, it'll provide you a lot more information so you'll know what to do next.

With all due respect Decent, slow down. Going to the teachers first without talking to the kid first will only damage future communication with her son. IMO. Besides, what worked for you won't necessarily work for TF. No offense ladies, but when a boy gets to a certain age, he more apt to talk with Dad than Mom. (puberty, girls, fights etc.) Again, this is just from my experience and in no way is meant to deter your involvement or make light of your input.

TwinsForever · #6 11-20-2008, 08:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Decent

Parent-Teacher conference, right away. Find out what's going on as far as the teachers are concerned. Talking too much, too distracted, or do the teachers seem to be too frazzled to give the attention needed, or is it a problem of not 'getting' things. Thats the first step, it'll provide you a lot more information so you'll know what to do next.

I have a good relationship with his homeroom teacher who also is the teacher where he is getting the C. We have been in contact since interim grades were released and I first saw the C. (He had other lower grades but did correct them before the end of the marking period.)

Most of the problem is coming from him not handing in his work. Which is amazing to me because he can do the work and does the work but then doesn't hand it in. I read his agenda as much as I can and I ask every day - did you do all your homework? Do you have any tests to study for? Any projects due?, etc., etc.

I can't hold his hand forever, he has to learn to be independent and follow through on his assignments. It will only get harder as he advances in school. I take a very 'hands off' approach to their school work. I will help them but I won't do it for them.

Some part of me says that he needs to fail in order to learn but on the other hand I want him to do the work that he is capable of. Does that make sense?

Where's the 'parent handbook' for all this crap??!!

TwinsForever · #7 11-20-2008, 08:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Curly

With all due respect Decent, slow down. Going to the teachers first without talking to the kid first will only damage future communication with her son. IMO. Besides, what worked for you won't necessarily work for TF. No offense ladies, but when a boy gets to a certain age, he more apt to talk with Dad more than Mom. (puberty, girls, fights etc.) Again, this is just from my experience and in no way is meant to deter your involvement or make light of your input.

I see your point Curly. He does hold his father higher on the pecking order than me!!
I brought his teacher into the loop because after repeated attempts by me to get him to talk to his teacher I finally had to get involved. I did give him the chance to correct it first.

I think I will talk to my husband later and let him handle the 'talk' later when he gets home.

Green Lantern · #8 11-20-2008, 08:54 AM

Maybe the class and class work is not interesting him. Maybe he is not challenged and therefore just bored. It is possible that the cirriculum is below his intellect or even his learning style.

Or it could be outside influences. Like Curly mentioned, there could be other things that he is thinking about.

Green Lantern · #9 11-20-2008, 08:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TwinsForever

I see your point Curly. He does hold his father higher on the pecking order than me!!
I brought his teacher into the loop because after repeated attempts by me to get him to talk to his teacher I finally had to get involved. I did give him the chance to correct it first.

I think I will talk to my husband later and let him handle the 'talk' later when he gets home.

Maybe you could have another family member that he is comfortable with talk to him. He might open up more with a grandparent, cousin, uncle, etc....

Curly · #10 11-20-2008, 08:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TwinsForever

I see your point Curly. He does hold his father higher on the pecking order than me!!
I brought his teacher into the loop because after repeated attempts by me to get him to talk to his teacher I finally had to get involved. I did give him the chance to correct it first.

I think I will talk to my husband later and let him handle the 'talk' later when he gets home.

Sounds to me that you're doing everything just fine. Strap in, the roller coaster ride has just begun.

From A's to C's! WTH??

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