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Originally Posted by Slacker  Try having a Happy Period. |
My response was tongue 'n cheek. However, I don't have to "try" having a happy period. I was born a male. We won our manly abilities fair and square and I'm not about to apologize for it.
According to some very "in the know" people, Adam fought like hell to get God to give MAN the ability to pee standing up and NOT have to have monthly periods.
He wanted to secure these things for all of future mankind because he knew how much fun it would be for men to be able to participate in pissing contests and all.
Of course, the fact that we don't have to worry about visits from "Aunt Flo," makes them so much more fun.
Eve, on the other hand, had to settle for the ability to experience multiple orgasms. That's right! She condemned all of future womankind to this crummy-assed fate.
Every victory has a downside. Monthly menstrual cycles is the price you women have to pay for the ability to experience multiple orgasms.
Being constantly brow beat over leaving the toilet seat up is the downside we men have to experience for being able to knock beer cans off a stool by peeing at them.
I realize that multiple orgasms do not come close to the thrill and satisfaction that we males experience every time another beer can falls off that stool, especially when we realize that we were at least 5-feet away.
It took millions of evolutionary years for us males to master such skills. As tough as it may seem, you women are just going to have to get over it.
ALL of us have our crosses to bear in this life, so stop the bitching over a little bleeding once a month.
If you want to blame someone for your periods, blame EVE! On the other hand, REMEMBER, had it not been for HER incompetence, you women would have nothing to bitch about TODAY.
Well, OK, there may be a few other things. But I'm not going to dwell on them here. It's neither the time nor the place.
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Originally Posted by Slacker Though I doubt I would write something like that, I would be afraid of getting arrested for terroristic threats. |
I thought the letter was spot on. Assuming that it was real, she made her point and did it with much humor.
This letter has made the circuit around the Internet several times. The last one I saw was signed by Mrs. Amanda Hurtz.
Proctor and Gamble would never consider such a letter as threatening. If real, I'd bet a sizable amount on its being prominently displayed on some executive's wall.
It probably brought much laughter to many of their employees, many of them probably still read it on occasion and still enjoy a hearty laugh.
I receive between 1,500 and 3,000 emails a week from people who are either delighted with what I've written or hate me for it.
I've learned how to tell the difference between a humorous release of pent up steam and real threats. So have the millions of marketing people who work for major corporations.
Had I been Mr. James Thatcher in receipt of such a letter, I'd have doubled over with laughter and replied to the sender.
I would have let her know that, being a man, I could not possibly know what it's like to go through a menstrual cycle. I would have thanked her for the letter and let her know that I didn't mean to offend her, personally. I would have sent her a couple of month's supply of product.
Marketing is always done by the averages and it always appeals to the lowest common denominator within the market segment the advertisers are attempting to capture.
This does not mean that market segments are all stupid. It just means that the marketers go after the weakest ones. Even in a room full of MENSA members, someone has to be the dumbest one in the room.
Do you remember those Tidy Bowl commercials back a few years? Women... standing around their toilets, on the verge of some of those multiple orgasms so bravely won by EVE.
ALL of it over some stupid toilet bowl cleaner. Or, how about those CIALIS commercials, with side-by-side tubs on a hillside... he in his, she in hers... just waiting for the moment to strike!
They think we're all stupid! Maybe we are.
And, how about all of the commercials that constantly depict men as stupid, mindless dweebs.
Do you see us men getting all pissed off about them? NO! We just assume our perceived role in life and blissfully leave the toilet seat up!
You know why? It's because we know, from those commercials, that you women will walk into your bathrooms; take a look at how clean that toilet bowl is; and just get sopping wet with orgasmic anticipation!
Now, just put the knife down. So far you've done nothing that will send you to prison. I'm just gonna turn around here and walk away, now.
Regards,
Joe Walther
Linear Mode
